Perfectionism

We all know that music is not an exercise in technical perfection, and that the goal is not just to play more in tune and more “perfectly” than the next person, but it’s reeeally hard to let go of that desire for note-perfect performances – especially in auditions and competitions.

But get this. Paradoxically, one of the key ingredients to performance/audition success (and a “perfect” performance) is letting go of this fixation on perfection.

What? That sounds backwards.

It does sound a little counterintuitive, but it turns out that perfection is an illusion. It’s like the mythical pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. The closer you get to it, the further away it moves. The more you improve, the more room for improvement you will see.

Aiming for perfection is one thing. Expecting perfection, demanding it, and beating yourself up for falling short dooms you to failure, frustration, and diminished confidence and motivation.

So what? Do I just lower my standards then?

Not exactly. Keep your standards high, maybe even raise them – but change your definition of perfection.

The Problem with Perfectionism

I once heard someone define perfectionism as “getting so stuck in the details that you forget the goal.” Technique is really just a means to an end, but we easily forget. We spend most of our time focusing on technique and technical issues, working to improve our skills in this area and often forget what for. When we begin learning a new piece, the majority of our focus starts with the technical details rather than the musical elements, and many times we don’t tie the two together until after we’ve gotten the technical elements under our fingers. However, this approach is actually sort of backwards (and no, it doesn’t matter if we are beginners or advanced world-class soloists.

Pianist Leon Fleisher once remarked that you only need as much technique is required to say what you want to say.

It’s a little bit like learning a foreign language. The whole idea is to be able to communicate with another individual, right? You may not have the accent down, nor even the correct grammatical structure, or appropriate word choice, but your primary goal is probably to be able to make it to the bathroom before it’s too late, not to speak like a native speaker, right? With your goal defined, then you figure out out all the details (vocabulary, grammar, pronunciation) of how to get this message across.

It’s very much the same in music – that we must first figure out what it is that we wish to say or communicate to our audience, after which we will then know how much work we require on technical issues so as to have the capacity to convey this successfully. Want to convey heartache in this phrase? What musical elements would convey this? What sort of tone, articulation, phrasing, etc. would suggest heartache? What technique is required to successfully execute these musical elements? Bow control? Breath control? Left hand/right hand coordination?

How Perfectionism Prevents You from Doing Your Best

So here’s the thing. The more you focus on technical perfection, the more nervous you will tend to be. Why? Because you don’t have much else going for you – and you know that the likelihood of a technically perfect performance is close to zero. There is a part of you that knows you are likely to fail from both a technical perspective and a “move the audience to tears” perspective. No wonder you’re nervous – you’re setting yourself up to fail.

Take a golfer, for instance. If the golfer focuses too much on swinging “perfectly” and not enough on where they want the ball to go, the ball often doesn’t go where they wanted it to go. How perfect the swing is doesn’t really matter – the final destination of the ball is what is important. Focus instead on where you want the ball to go, and your body figures out a way to get it there (assuming you have had the proper training, and have practiced correctly).

Just as it is possible to move someone to tears with a less than “perfect” performance which nonetheless contains your heart and soul, it is also possible to put an audience to sleep with a note-perfect performance that has no message – a performance that is essentially just a well-rehearsed sequence of pretty sounds and not much else.

Clarinetist James Campbell once said that if you’re nervous, it means you don’t know the music well enough. I think he means that if you really know the music, have a very clear idea about what you are trying to say, and remain focused on this during your performance (the message, not the how-to technical details of it), the limitations of your brain’s attentional capacity leave it with very little opportunity to process thoughts related to worry, nervousness, failure, etc. In other words, you end up being so focused on the important things that matter and that you have control over, that you don’t have time to be nervous.

When you focus on the music and what it is that you intend to “say”, nerves tend to be less of an issue, but more importantly, you also tend to play better – even in terms of intonation and sound. When you know you have something special to communicate, you tend to just concern yourself with saying it, instead of worrying if it will come out “perfectly”.

Ok, I can see the benefit of letting go of perfection in concerts, but what about auditions/competitions? The point is to win, right?

It’s actually the same idea with competitions/auditions. Yes, it’d be great to win, but that isn’t really up to you.

You Have a Responsibility to the Audience, Not for the Audience.

What does this mean?

You have a responsibility to show the panel the most authentic version of who you are and what you have to offer. You don’t really know what the panel is looking for anyway, and certainly can’t control what they think about your performance, so you might as well show them who you really are, instead of trying to sound like someone you are not. Sure, they may hate it, and you might not represent the kind of player or “sound” they are looking for, but at least you took a stand and played your best instead of sounding like a sub-par version of someone else.

Do you need to play perfectly? Yes, most definitely, but this is only a part of what you work out in the practice room. It is counterproductive to make technique your sole focus when you’re standing in front of the screen. This leads to “paralysis by analysis” and technical mistakes, not to mention a dull, uninspired performance.

Take a Stand

I used to watch a lot of home improvement shows on HGTV, and I remember one show where a young couple redesigned their great room with a gothic-inspired look. Lots of blacks, reds, stone statues, etc. It was totally not my style and would have creeped me out to live there, but I had to admit that it was extremely well done. They totally committed to the style, and didn’t compromise on anything. No apologies, no punches pulled. In this sense it was so much more well done than the other two couples’ makeovers that were also shown in that episode.

Bottom line? Take a stand. Cultivate the highest of standards, but music-basedstandards that revolve around your musical intentions and how successfully you are able to convey them rather than technique-based standards such as perfect intonation and sound. You’ll find that when you have some really cool, interesting, and compelling musical ideas to share, you’ll be less nervous, your performance will be of a far greater quality, and paradoxically, you will probably find that your sound and intonation improve as well.

Parting Thought

I’ll leave you with a quote “The only reason for mastering technique is to make sure the body does not prevent the soul from expressing itself.”

Let go of perfection in favor of cultivating a clear message, and you’ll find yourself playing more perfectly in the delivery of this message.

Mental Practicing

It is said that legendary pianists Rubinstein and Horowitz hated practicing. Rubinstein simply didn’t like practicing for hours on end, while Horowitz supposedly feared that practicing on pianos other than his own would negatively affect his touch. Their solution? A healthy dose of mental practice.

Though many of us may never be legends, mental practice is something that allmusicians can absolutely benefit from, regardless of skill level.

Have a concert coming up that you’re not ready for, but too tired to practice? Want to practice but can’t, because of a flare-up of tendonitis or a bad cold? Practice rooms full? Instrument in the shop? Too early/too late to practice? Only have 15 minutes, so it’s not really worth getting your instrument out of your locker, finding a practice room, and getting set up, only to have to quit a few minutes later?

Sound familiar?

Sure, but just imagining yourself playing can’t be the same as real physical practice, right?

You’re right. It’s not the same, but from studies of athletes, we know that successful individuals tend to engage in more systematic and extensive mental rehearsals than less successful individuals. Yes, I acknowledge that there are some differences between athletes and musicians – but not as many as you would think when it comes to the mental aspect of performance.

Furthermore, researchers are finding more neurological and physiological evidence to support what top athletes such as basketball great Larry Bird, Olympic diver Greg Louganis, and golfer Tiger Woods have known for years – that mental practice produces real changes and tangible improvements in performance. In one study, participants who mentally practiced a 5-finger sequence on an imaginary piano for two hours a day had the same neurological changes (and reduction in mistakes) as the participants who physically practiced the same passage on an actual piano. Some have suggested that mental practice activates the same brain regions as physical practice, and may even lead to the same changes in neural structure and synaptic connectivity.

In other words, there is growing evidence that mental practice (if done correctly), can absolutely make a difference in your playing.

Keys to Effective Mental Practice

The psychological literature on mental rehearsal suggests that there are two important keys to keep in mind when engaging in mental rehearsal – that it be systematic and vivid. In other words, mental practice is not the same as daydreaming, in the same way that practicing on autopilot is not very helpful. To be effective, it must be structured just as actual practice, with self-evaluation, problem solving, and correction of mistakes.

Some Guidelines on Mental Rehearsal

Here are some ideas on how to get started.

1. Calm down
Close your eyes. Focus only on your breathing for a minute. Breathe in slowly and fully through your nose, then breathe slowly out through your mouth. Then do a total body scan for tension: check your head and facial muscles, your jaw, neck, shoulders, arms, wrists, hands, back, hips, quads, hamstrings, calves, ankles, even toes. Let any tension you find just melt away.

2. Expand your focus
It can be anything – your instrument, the stand in your practice room, a specific wall. See it in your head. At first, it may not have much detail, or you may have trouble bringing it into focus. That’s ok, your goal is to take something small, make it more vivid, and begin to expand that vividness into the rest of your imagined environment. You’ll get better with practice.

3. Warm up
Imagine yourself playing scales or warming up with something easy. Can you hear yourself? Exactly the way it sounds? What do you feel? Can you feel your fingers, your arms, shoulders, lungs, throat, etc.? See how vividly you can mentally recall the kinesthetic elements involved in playing your instrument.

4. Imagine
See, feel, and hear yourself starting to play. Concentrate on the motions that produce the sounds and effects you want as you go through the music, note by note, phrase by phrase in your head. Keep “playing” until you make a mistake or feel the need to correct the way something sounded.

5. TiVo it
When you “hear” or “see” yourself play something that doesn’t sound like you want it to, immediately hit the pause button on your mental TiVo. Rewind to a place before the mistake. Start from that point, moving slowly forward, at a speed you can control. Repeat this process several times, just as you would in real practice, until you’re doing it correctly up to speed. Don’t just keep rewinding and trying it again mindlessly – make sure you hit pause, think about why the mistake happened, hit play, try it again, and then move on when you’re satisfied you got it down and know why the mistake happened in the first place.

6. Keep it real
It’s important to make the experience as vivid and real as you can – feel the instrument under your fingers, hands, lips. Really hear the sound, the textures, the volume. See the room around you and the instrument you are playing.

Additional Suggestions

When you use this technique, break it up into shorter segments, like phrases or shorter sections of the piece. You don’t always have to play straight through.

Try visualizing yourself in different locations, wearing different clothes, and in different conditions.

When you feel you’ve gotten the hang of mental practice, try testing yourself. Record yourself performing an excerpt, review and rate your performance, then run through a series of mental rehearsals of that excerpt taking notes about what you notice. Then perform again, review and rate your performance, and make note of what has changed.

Once you make systematic mental practice a part of your everyday practice routine, I am certain you’ll soon wonder how you ever did without it.

 

What Every Musician Ought to Know About Stage Fright

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Think back to your last big audition or performance. What do you remember feeling, moments before you walked on stage?

Heart pounding in your chest? Butterflies in your stomach? Cold, clammy hands? Feeling light-headed, tight, weak, or shaky?

Perhaps you had trouble concentrating? Felt your mind racing? Doubts and fears popping into your head? A vague sense that something bad was going to happen? Kicking yourself for not practicing more?

Sound familiar?

Is It Just Me?

Well, you’re certainly not alone. In fact, you’re in good company. Pablo Casals, Arthur Rubinstein, and Luciano Pavarotti (to name a few), are reported to have struggled with performance anxiety at various points in their careers.

For what it’s worth, anxiety is pretty common even amongst professional musicians. In one survey, 96% of the orchestra musicians surveyed admitted to anxiety before performances. In another survey of 48 ICSOM orchestras, 1 out of every 4 musicians said that stage fright was a problem for them.

“Ok, fine, but the fact that Rubinstein struggled with nerves isn’t going to help me win an audition.”

Good point. Keep reading.

 

Will It Ever Go Away?

Great question, and I’ve got some good news and bad news for you.

Bad news is that unless you’re a robot, zombie, or just don’t give a crap, you will probably experience some degree of anxiety every time you go on stage. “Say WHAT? You mean I have to suffer through this for the rest of my career?”

Well, the good news is that no, you don’t have to let your nerves control you, and you most definitely don’t have to suffer.

Have you ever had a performance when everything just “clicked?” Where you felt like you were in total control, everything just flowed easily, and you sounded great (at least until you started thinking about how well everything was going)? You may have heard of this referred to as “the zone.” Well, this magical state pretty much requires that you experience some degree of anxiety. No anxiety, no zone.

If you ever get to a point in your career where you start feeling nothing and walk on-stage as if it’s no different than going for a walk in the park (i.e. it’s just another day, another venue, and you’re just mailing it in), your audience is probably not going to get the best performance you have to offer.

Why Do We Experience Stage Fright?

So why do we experience anxiety in some situations and not in others? If the two people sitting out in the audience were Isaac Stern and Leon Fleisher, my anxiety probably would have gone through the roof. What gives?

Well, the biopsychosocial stress model is probably the best explanation of why we experience performance anxiety.

“Anxiety is the product of a complex and dynamic cognitive appraisal process which actively balances an individual’s perceptions of resources, situational demands, and internal and external sources of feedback prior to, during, and following performances.  One’s appraisal of the demands of a performance situation (e.g. task difficulty, consequences of failure, others’ high expectations, and the perceived importance of the outcome) are compared with one’s unique individual characteristics (e.g. self-efficacy, trait anxiety, skill level, degree of preparation, and past experience), resulting in an overall assessment of the degree to which the situation poses a threat.”

What does all that mean? Basically, your brain tries to calculate the odds that you’ll nail this performance, and the odds that you’ll fall on your face. If your brain decides that you are probably going to do really well, you won’t feel anxious. Excited perhaps, but not anxious.

On the other hand, if your brain thinks there is a good chance you could crash and burn, you will most definitely feel anxious. Simple as that.

Here are two scenarios.

Scenario #1: Imagine you are playing an easy piece that you could play perfectly even if I woke you up at 3AM, and are doing so in front of an audience that will love your playing no matter what (say, your grandparents). Think you can handle that?

Well, given that it would be pretty hard to screw up, and even if you did, your grandparents wouldn’t notice or care, you will probably be pretty darn confident that you can handle the situation.

Brain says piece of cake, no worries. No anxiety for you.

Scenario #2: Now let’s say that you are at an orchestra audition. You’re sick and tired of auditioning, are almost broke, and this is the orchestra you’ve really had your heart set on. However, you know that there are 200 other musicians auditioning for the same seat. You heard a few of them warming up in the green room, and oh crap, they sounded awfully good. You haven’t played well in the last few auditions you took, and haven’t had as much time to practice as you would have liked.

Well, it looks like you will have to play your absolute best if you’re going to stand out from the others, but what are the chances of that, right?

Brain concludes that this is a pretty challenging set of circumstances. There is a very real chance you could fail to get through to the next round, let alone make it all the way to the final cut. Think you might be a little anxious? You betcha.

So What Can I Do About It?

Let me start by telling you what the answer is not.

  • Trying not to care is not the answer (good luck trying to fool yourself anyway).
  • Some take supplements like kava (I tried this a few times; don’t even bother).
  • Many have experimented with beta blockers like Inderal.
  • Others try relaxation strategies, meditation, yoga, etc.
  • I used to deprive myself of sleep the night before, thinking that my being tired would balance out the adrenaline a bit. Don’t do it – you’ll just be cranky and tired on top of being anxious.
  • I tried drinking lots of chamomile tea before performances, even though I don’t much care for tea. This just made me paranoid about having to go to the bathroom at the worst possible time.
  • A friend told me that I should eat bananas, so I even tried this a few times. It just made me feel a little sick to my stomach (I’m not a huge fan of bananas).
  • Another friend told me to eat turkey explaining that turkey has the amino acid tryptophan in it, which supposedly makes you sleepy. Um, ok, but how many of you are in the mood to chow down on bananas, turkey, and tea 30 minutes before you go on stage? Ugh.

Fact is, I haven’t seen any research evidence that the potassium in bananas makes any difference in your anxiety level before performing, and if you’re going to load up on tryptophan, it would be more efficient to eat egg whites (4x as much tryptophan as turkey), cod (3x), or parmesan cheese (2x) instead of turkey. But here too, I’ve not seen any concrete evidence that tryptophan reduces performance anxiety, let alone make you perform better. Of course, if you are aware of a study that I haven’t come across, please send me a copy, and I’ll be happy to take a look.

“But wait! What about all of those people who swear that bananas, turkey, tea, etc. make them feel calmer? How do you explain their experience?”

Actually, they are probably telling the truth. These things probably do make them feel calmer. But not because of any special chemical ingredient in these foods. It’s called the placebo effect. Statistically, about one out of every three people who try something, will swear that it worked – even if it was completely bogus. Wikipedia has a nice page on the placebo effect if you’d like to read more about it.

But here’s the real kicker. A lot of people assume that reducing performance anxiety is a good thing, but in reality, this is just a myth. Before you start sending me emails explaining how I am mistaken, look back on your own performance history. I’m sure you will be able to think of performances when you were too calm and too relaxed, and saw your playing suffer as a result.

Even more people (experts included) believe that a moderate amount of anxiety is best, and that too much or too little anxiety is bad. Guess what? This isn’t completely true either. Don’t believe me? Stay tuned for a future article that will explain all of this in more detail. Until then, here is the main take-home point.

What you want is to play your best, right? Reducing your anxiety or shooting for a moderate amount of anxiety will make you more comfortable, but not necessarily help you play better. This is why trying to relax isn’t the answer. What you need, is to learn how to control and channel your anxiety into more dynamic and powerful performances.

How do I do this, you ask?

The 9 Keys to Becoming the Best That You Can Be

Nine different ways, to be specific:

  1. Preperation : Learn how to practice the right way
  2. Manage Energy: Learn how to control your body’s response to adrenaline
  3. Confidence: Learn how to build confidence
  4. Courage: Learn how to play courageously (vs. playing tentatively and worrying about mistakes)
  5. Concentration: Learn how to slow down and regain control of your mind – even under pressure
  6. Focus: Learn how to quiet the mind, focus past distractions, and stay in the moment
  7. Resilience: Learn how to recover quickly from mistakes (so you don’t make even more mistakes)
  8. Determination: Learn how to keep yourself motivated and relentlessly pursue your goals
  9. X-Factor: Learn to unlock that something special, that je ne sais quois that makes all the difference in the world

Helping you master these nine performance psychology skills is ultimately what this site is about. Once you develop these skills, you will no longer be concerned about stage fright or performance anxiety. You may not be comfortable, but it won’t matter. Your performances will speak for themselves. And at the end of the day, that’s what really matters, right?